word count: 2.8k
author's notes: I always tell myself to stay away from light hearted and slight humor. But, I never listen. This was a struggle for me to write simply because it’s out of my element. This was written for the astrongbreeze exchange. Warning: I’m not funny yet I still manage to try.
LOST (BUT NOT FOUND)
You watch me bleed until I can't breathe
I'm shaking falling onto my knees
I'm tripping over myself
I'm aching begging you to come help
It would be misleading to say that the progression of Kyungsoo’s seventh year was diverted by something as measly as a crush being directed at him. But, it was just that for the wide eyed eighteen year old who was neither romantic or sentimental.
Kyungsoo isn't given the opportunity to marinate in his despair at the prospect of being back at Hogwarts for his final year before something is already happening. He should have known that it would be asking absolutely too much if he could coexist in a world with Oh Sehun peacefully.
They once had been good friends. Way back when Kyungsoo's muggle mother had not been an issue and when popularity was inconceivable for the gawky awkward teen with toothpicks for arms. As soon as Sehun had bloomed into tall, mysterious, and handsome he had seen the downfall of their friendship on the horizon. Truthfully, Kyungsoo did miss the first year Sehun who had been lost and near tears when Kyungsoo found him huddled in one of the innermost corridors. Sehun had been cute. Now he was all hormones, broad shoulders, douchebag tendencies.
It really was too much to ask for a peaceful year?
Unfortunately tall, dumb and stupid block his way. The infamous Slytherin trio consists of Oh Sehun (tall), Park Chanyeol (dumb), and Byun Baekhyun (stupid). Kyungsoo pauses with his trunk he had been previously dragging to narrow his eyes. They're certainly up to no good considering the guilty expression Sehun is wearing and the dofus grin spreading across Dumb and Dumber's faces.
“What do you want?” Kyungsoo deadpans dropping his trunk and hand moving to cup his wand in the pocket of his robes. Unfortunately for them he had long since learned to never give them a benefit of the doubt considering the last time Baekhyun had hexed him with a giggle charm.
“Do we have to have a motive to see our good pal from Ravenclaw?” Baekhyun says slithering over as he puts an arm around Kyungsoo’s shoulders squeezing faintly.
As far as Kyungsoo is concerned yes. His eyes fall on Sehun - who despite being around his dumbass friends is not a complete moron as one would like to think. He knows he has a few seconds to get these dimwits from Kyungsoo’s presence before it gets ugly.
“We just wanted to see our Sehunnie’s Kyungsoo.” Chanyeol says - all smiles and handsomeness but Kyungsoo is absolutely certain there is nothing behind that forehead.
“Fuck off.” He says back coiling up in himself, tugging away from Baekhyun’s persistent grip. “I thought you would have learned when you put in a family of doxies my bed to not mess with me.” Kyungsoo mutters.
He knows it’s only a matter of time before they make their moves. He could not be in the presence of the trio without something going horribly messed up. His eyes narrow in on Sehun fiddling with his robes. Naturally, it’s not fair because Kyungsoo is one of the best duellers in his class. He has to be if he wants to avoid a life of displeasantires.
Sehun barely has his wand out when Kyungsoo booms out,
“Protego.” A silvery blue blooms from the tip of his wand. Whatever Sehun mutters is beyond him and moments too slow. It hits the shielding spell and reflects right off of Kyungsoo’s wand and hits Sehun right in the chest. The Slytherin takes a tumble, knocking back into the wall, metaphorically bitch slapped with his own spell.
Kyungsoo picks flint from his robes and picks up his trunk again. Baekhyun and Chanyeol stand horrified as they bend down to collect Sehun. “I said don’t fuck with me.” He snaps and turns on his heels to get to the Ravenclaw commons before he commits a few accounts of murder.
He should have known it would be far from the last time he heard from them. Junmyeon is picking at his pumpkin flavored pastry as he clears his throat the table in the Great Hall during breakfast a few days later.
“I hate to be the bearer of bad news but it seems Sehun cannot take his eyes off you. It’s quite concerning actually..” Junmyeon says pointedly, finger flicking towards the Slytherin table. “Do you think they’re up to something?”
Kyungsoo looks up from spreading butterbeer flavored jam on his toast. He briefly looks over his shoulder and sure enough Sehun’s eyes are trained right on him unwaveringly. Odd, Kyungsoo thinks. He would think the other would be smart enough to know Kyungsoo was not afraid of sending him to the infirmary boneless.
He turns back to Junmyeon. “He might be peeved I reflected his spell back on himself. I didn’t stick around too long after that to see what he had casted. I hope it’s something to grow warts on his pretty boy face.” He says bitterly.
Junmyeon smiles a little. “You’re still soft on him, you know. You’re ruthless with Chanyeol and Baekhyun but when it comes to Sehun you still are a fretting mother hen.”
This was hardly soft. Kyungsoo rolls his eyes. “He was my best friend. Even though he has taken a tumble on the darkside it doesn’t mean I don’t care about him still. He just needs tough love. Anyway, he tried to jinx me.”
“Well, best friend who has met the darkside is making his way over here.” Junmyeon smiles knowingly and stands grabbing his things. “See you around Kyungsoo. Good luck.”
Junmyeon struts off to probably make a bed in the library to study for his upcoming OWLs as Kyungsoo sends him a betrayed look. Sure enough there is a presence at his side that is plopping down in the empty seat. Kyungsoo stiffens by instinct.
But Sehun doesn’t say anything.
Kyungsoo turns his head is surprised to find Sehun is sitting awfully close. He’s basically glued to Kyungsoo’s face, his face hovering inches away from his own.
“Can I help you?” Kyungsoo asks, eyes narrowing.
Sehun doesn’t reply right away but instead just meets Kyungsoo’s gaze. This is very much unlike Sehun who usually looks anywhere but his face. Kyungsoo swallows and he swears the other male follows the movement of his adam’s apple that seems lodged in his throat so suddenly.
“I love you.” Sehun blurts the confession out unceremoniously.
If Kyungsoo would have imagined his first confession or any confession at that it wouldn’t have gone this way. Instead he stares for a long moment before he can unseal his lips. “WHAT?”
“Chanyeol told me it would wear off. ‘Said it was only a part of the charm, y’know? But this feelings very, very real..” Sehun says and his words get jumbled at the rate he’s talking. Kyungsoo has to hang on to every last syllable to fully understand. “This isn’t wearing off--instead every minute that passes I am thinking more about you than before. Do you think we can go out?”
Kyungsoo’s mouth falls open and he stares flabbergasted. He takes a moment before he grabs his pumpkin juice and drops it right over the other’s head.
“Idiot.” Kyungsoo snaps, figuring this was just another joke the other male was playing on him. He does not miss the roar of laughter coming from the Slytherin table.
“Jongin, you’re going to incinerate the end of your robes.” Kyungsoo says to the Hufflepuff who clearly wasn’t very mindful when they’re in the midst of their potions assignment. Sadly, for Jongin at least, he seems to be the worst potions student that year who unluckily got paired with the best. Normally this might be a good thing but Kyungsoo was a very dutiful student.
“M’sorry.” Jongin murmurs quietly, voice soft as his eyes nervously flutter anywhere but Kyungsoo’s face.
It was going to result in Kyungsoo telling Jongin off for being so careless especially when it meant it was going to effect Kyungsoo’s grade but he pauses when he literally feels a pair of eyeballs boring into his skull.
He sighs heavily already knowing who the culprit was. Sehun was getting out of hand. His joke was going way too far. If he was set on testing Kyungsoo’s patiences then so be it. “Jongin!” Kyungsoo snaps when he sees Jongin nearly dump the sprouts in the mixture. “Just take notes. I’ll do it.” He says watching the younger jump in surprise. He nods quickly and moves out of Kyungsoo’s way. Bless his soul but he was helpless as hell.
Kyungsoo hears the crime of the belltower. It doesn’t take for long the classroom to descend into chaos as students try to pile out quickly. Kyungsoo can only remind Jongin they’re going to meet later that evening to go over a few things so next time Jongin doesn’t almost blow them up. Frankly, he isn’t sure why Jongin didn’t sign up for Care For Magical Creatures. He shakes his head as he carefully puts his books in his bags. Unfortunately, it seems he isn’t alone. Sehun has stayed behind, waiting for Kyungsoo at the door bag in hand. Kyungsoo holds in the sigh that is threatening to escape. His fingers tightened around his own bag as he walks right past the tall buffoon. Sehun mindlessly follows.
“What do you want Sehun? We haven’t talked in years and suddenly you’re everywhere I turn. This isn’t funny.” Kyungsoo snaps looking over his shoulder at the male. “What is it? Do you need help studying because I don’t see how you’re getting any done by stalking me.”
A blossom of red crosses the younger’s face as he looks down feet still carrying him to follow Kyungsoo. “No-- that’s not it--”
“Then what is it? Don’t tell me. You want to go out? Don’t humor me Sehun. You’re not fit to be a comedian but you’ll be a dead man if you keep fucking with me.”
Sehun’s lips looked sealed shut as he looks like Kyungsoo struck him across the face. It makes Kyungsoo pause as an emotion crosses Sehun’s face that he hasn’t seen in a very long time. It makes Kyungsoo stop dead in his tracks. He was Sehun’s best friend for so long he knew every expression, every mannerism, and every gesture.
“Sehun, you’re serious.” Although it’s not a question it ends in an infliction that suggests it might be.
Sehun looks like he is a deer caught in headlights. An unknown weight plummets in Kyungsoo’s chest. He wasn’t messing around with Kyungsoo? A heat breaks out over Kyungsoo’s face as he hesitantly peers up at Sehun unsure what he should say or do in this situation. Kyungsoo is surprised by the wounded brown eyes, blinking as if he’s waiting for Kyungsoo to break down the rest of his defenses. Kyungsoo weakens at this because really Sehun has not changed at all. He’s still the defenseless first year Kyungsoo had been so fond of.
Kyungsoo does not want to see his friend’s vulnerabilities exposed. Despite Sehun making Kyungsoo’s life a lot harder than it needed to be these last few years he knows the real culprits are his idiotic friends.
When it becomes apparent Sehun is not going to be able to find any words to summon up to explain his feelings or behavior to Kyungsoo the older male sighs some. Kyungsoo reaches out to wrap his hand around Sehun’s wrist tugging him along. Any looks they get in the corridors from fellow students are not seen by Sehun whose eyes stay glued to the ground and Kyungsoo who ignores their catcalling. Had he been the only one to not know?
Finding an empty room in the library is not easy during this time of year but Kyungsoo is able to bribe a few other Ravenclaw to spare it for some time. They cast one look at Sehun who looks on the verge of crying and pack their things wordlessly. Somehow, the thought that perhaps everyone saw something he hadn’t seen irritates Kyungsoo.
He’s sympathetic for Sehun. How long had he felt this way and how long had he bottled those feelings inside of himself? Even when Sehun had managed to say something Kyungsoo had dismissed it promptly as a joke. Wasn’t that a bit cruel?
He spins on his heels gazing at the boy in question who looks more lost than Kyungsoo gives him credit for.
“Sehun?” Kyungsoo questions lightly, trying to coax anything out of him before Kyungsoo comes to his own disastrous conclusions.
“Kyungsoo.” Sehun says softly in response.
It's the first time in a very long time Kyungsoo is so vividly reminded of what his and Sehun’s relationship used to be before the politics of the wizarding world got in the way. In a way, he misses the other. He misses knowing Sehun's vulnerabilities and fears. He misses being Sehun's protector and best friend. So, it seems beyond surreal and crazy that Sehun has quietly harbored a crush this long without saying anything when they could have been doing much more productive things than bickering.
“Do you like me?” Kyungsoo asks lightly, voice strained as if he still doesn't quite believe it. He knows without a doubt from the hesitant look swirling in Sehun's baby brown eyes the answer is yes. He just needs him to confirm it.
Sehun stares quietly swallowing down the thickness in his throat. He's unsure where this might leave him. For a long time be thought he could silently keep his feelings to himself. After years of watching, waiting, and wanting to be close to Kyungsoo again it's become explosive. What does he have to lose anymore? This vulnerability, this weakness all derived from the fondness he feels for the other could easily go away by just getting it off his chest.
“Yes. I do.”
Kyungsoo takes a loud breath. As expected, he muses. Apart of him is angry that the other has waited so long and wasted so much time stolen from their glory years. They could have been doing so much more than becoming rivals. Kyungsoo would never ever judge Sehun for something as simple as a crush.
“Why didn't you say anything?” Kyungsoo asks. “Did you really think putting a love spell on me would be genius? You know I'm better at spells than you are. What did you hope for?” It comes out as nagging as he watched Sehun flinch and close up on himself at Kyungsoo's tone. “I wouldn't ever hate you.”
At that Sehun's gaze raises. There is an incredible amount of fondness in his gaze. Had Kyungsoo just been blind?
“I was scared. I let Chanyeol and Baekhyun speak things in my ears. A love spell was a bad idea. I knew it would wear off if I was successful. I was just so d-desperate. I thought maybe you would notice this way. Admittedly, it wasn't my most clever course of actions. I just really, really like you.” His voice trails off. “I wanted you to like me in return.”
Kyungsoo shakes his head. “You fool. Literally all you had to do was say something. We used to be good friends. I would never abandon you.”
Sehun looks almost sheepish and it warms a place in Kyungsoo's chest that had been vacant so long but had always belonged to the former. Always.
“I can't tell you I'm in love with you.” Kyungsoo says as Sehun tenses. “But, why don't we start by going to
Hogsmeade together? I miss buying you a butterbeer.”
The worry erases off Sehun's face and he smiles. He really smiles.
God, how Kyungsoo has missed that radiant smile.
“I'd love that, hyung.”
Somehow, Kyungsoo suspects it won't be very long for Kyungsoo to confidently say he can return Sehun's feelings.
Kyungsoo can feel Chanyeol's stare digging into his skin as he shoots into his seat next to Sehun in the library. Nearly all the Slytherin don't need to ask why the short Ravenclaw is joining their table when Sehun leans in towards him subtly a rosy pink dusting across his cheeks.
Baekhyun raises an eyebrow and Kyungsoo knows they're about to say something dumb as fuck.
“How much gallons you wanna’ bet that Sehun has gotten the success?” Baekhyun inquires to no one in particular.
Kyungsoo can feel the headache forming as he questions his boyfriend's taste in friends.
“The last I heard Kyungsoo is hung - I don't think our Sehunnie would waste any time going down on that.” Chanyeol murmurs back none too quiet in the dead silence of the library.
Kyungsoo has never been so grateful for mastering the silencing charm until now. But the heat and weight pressing into his side stirs something more than second-hand embarrassment from the bumbling fools. It reminds him that his future is promising for more ways than one.
But he's hardly forgiving - Sehun's friends or not.
author's note: as always you can talk to me at @junxouji on twitter. :’) remember to comment if you enjoyed. It’s much appreciated fam!